What are some different parenting styles
“The Commander-in-Parent”
This is the bossy parent. Theirs is the only way to do something and that is the way they told you to do it. They often use the term “Because I Said So” to end a conversation. The commander-in-parent is someone that raises their voice constantly, expects their children to always listen to them and know the rules of the house. Their children can not deviate from these rules or question why without retribution. They rule by fear.
Ruling by fear and being an overbearing parent will only backfire. Many children who come from overbearing parents raise their children in the complete opposite manner. Try to find a line somewhere in the middle. Be stern but listen to their side. Learn to negotiate with them more and let them be a part of the discussion.
The Commander In Parent
The “anything goes” parent
This parent is the one who rarely, if ever, steps in. They beleive that if they provide their children all the tools necessary the children will make correct decisions. The children need to learn, and the best way to do that is to make decisions on their own regardless of right or wrong. There is very little supervison with the anything-goes parent. This is the polar opposite of the helicopter parent and a truly interesting parenting style to witness in action.
I’m all for having fun but children need boundaries. They need a curfew and rules and most times appreciate when they realize you are looking out for them.
I have to admit this looks like fun but don’t try it at home
“Head in the sand” parent
The head in the sand parenting style is clueless of anything that goes on around them concerning their child. They prefer to think that when something goes wrong it’s just because “he/she is being a kid”. Instead of looking at the potential problem they bury their head in the sand and hope it goes away.
You can not go through life by ignoring problems and hoping they will go away. Face the issue head on and solve the problem. Problems which are not addressed will only get larger and harder to conquer.
The Head In The Sand Parent thinks that the problem will go away.
“My kid’s special” parent
We have all experienced this parenting style. The one that has to proclaim how special their child is because she was reading in kindergarten. “She fell out of the womb with a book in her hand”. We get it, you think your child is fantastic, we all do. There are many other children just as smart or talented as yours. It’s OK to love your child and boast about their achievements but because they achieved “guppy” level in swim class doesn’t they will be in the Olympics.
Being proud of your children is fine but be realistic of their strengths. If you’ve ever watched American Idol you’ve seen the poor kid whose parents said they were a great singer. They open their mouth and it’s just not good. Direct your children to their talents.
Your child is not going to the Olympics, he’s 4!
“Helicopter” parent
Helicopter parents are the ones that meddle in every apsect of a child’s life and become overprotective. This is over-parenting at it’s finest. The helicopter parent is consistently “hovering” over the child. Often times children of helicopter parents grow up with anxiety and can do nothing on their own. They find it difficult to make a decision because they never had to in life.
It’s ok to be protective of your children but you have to let them make some mistakes in life and learn. You will not always be there for them and need to slowly let go of them.
Now you can safely go outside!
READ MORE ON HELICOPTER PARENTING
“Ghost” Parent
The Ghost Parent wants nothing to do with their children. They don’t attend school events, sports, dance recitals, conferences with teachers etc. The Ghost Parent is not involved in their child’s life on purpose. They might make excuses as to why they can’t attend events due to work or something similar. However, it is a conscious choice to miss everything and not support their children. This is a terrible parenting style!
Don’t make excuses, just show up! It’s simple. You may not think your children notice your absence but they do.
Don’t be a ghost parent, be this guy instead!
“Living vicariously through their child” parent
To me this could be the most annoying type of parent. This parent enrolls their child in every possible activity they can regardless of if the child wants to or not. Their child has to play football because they played football. These are the parents that yell at the umpires and referees at the games and cause a scene. It’s OK to involve your children in extracurricular activities but make sure they are interested before doing so.
Pushing your children to join sports or activities that don’t interest them can create animosity. Just because you were a star football player in high school doesn’t mean that your son or daughter has to be. If they want to join the school musical let them. It’s their life to live, not yours.
Let your children decide what they want to participate in
Chances are you fit into one of these particular parenting styles or perhaps you are a combination of a couple of them. The important thing to remember is that whatever parenting style you currently use you are leaving a lasting impression on your children for better or for worse.
The bigger question is are you comfortable with your style or do you feel you need to make some changes? Let us know below in the comments.
While you’re at it make sure your children are well mannered.
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